Things Parents Should Never Do

  • By: admin
  • Date: October 15, 2021
  • Time to read: 5 min.

As a father of four, ranging from toddlers to teens, I have come to learn that there is no set manual for raising children. However, some guidelines benefit everyone, no matter the situation, especially when, as parents, we get caught up in things parents should never do.

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Firstly, let’s look at the four parenting styles:

  • Authoritarian – This strict parenting style employs harsh disciplining, which parents frequently call “tough love.” Authoritarian parents often communicate with their kids without asking for participation or feedback to maintain complete control.
  • Authoritative – authoritative parents are caring, supporting, and often aware of their children’s needs.
  • Permissive – Permissive parents tend to adopt a buddy position with their children instead of a parenting one.
  • Neglectful – This style, often known as uninvolved parenting, is characterized by a general sense of disinterest.

Every type of parenting does have a different influence on kids’ behavior, and we can distinguish them by specific features. 

These include responsiveness (how warm and attentive mom and dad are to their child’s welfare) and overprotection (the degree of restraint parents place on the children in a bid to control their behavior). 

With that said, here are:

22 Things Parents Must Avoid Doing

1.  Not Listening.

In our fast-paced, noise-filled, electronic-filled worlds, we must remember to listen. They could be trying to tell you something important!

2. Failing to Tell Children How Much You Love Them

We get so caught up in the daily routines that we fail to tell our kids how much we love them frequently. You will not mess up your children by informing them you love them because spoiling is typically the consequence of giving children things in place of love.

3. Embarrassing Them in Public.

We know it’s difficult not to do if your young child chooses to have a massive meltdown in the store’s snack toy section! Nevertheless, it is preferable for everyone if, if they misbehave in a crowd, you carry them away and reprimand them discreetly.

4. Criticizing the Child, Instead of Their Behavior

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We know it’s more complicated than it sounds, and it may require some absolute self-control, but put emphasis on the actions instead. Once your child misbehaves, instead of correcting them, tell children their behavior is inexcusable and make suggestions.

5. Making Comparisons

It’s difficult not to, but try not to compare your children to their peers, especially their siblings. It can genuinely damage their self-esteem over the long term.

6. Being Afraid to Say No

Structure and routine are beneficial to children. Don’t be afraid to say No and mean it, even if it means sulking/whining for hours. They will quickly realize that when Mum or Dad say No, they mean it!

7. Forgetting to Give Them a Hug

We all enjoy a good hug, and even as your child grows older, it’s critical to schedule time for hugs and cuddles regularly!

8. Invading Their Privacy

As much as we parents value our privacy, so do our children; give them space and respect their privacy.

9. Not Establishing Limits

It’s critical to establish limits for screen time, bedtime, and curfew so that children understand their responsibilities.

10. Not Spending Time With Them.

There is no set rule about quality time. Anytime spent with children is welcome. Let them know what you do and even take suggestions(whether you’ll use them or not). 

Don’t forget to spend alone time with each child as often as possible; it will benefit both of you.

11. Giving Them Too Many Options

Limit their options – this is especially important with younger children who find it difficult to choose just one.

12. Always Doing Things For Them

Oh, we know – this is a difficult one – the desire to do it instead because we will be faster! Please resist the urge to do things for them or to save them from a fall.

Sometimes you have to take a step back. It helps the children prepare for life rather than constantly shielding them from it.

13.  Avoiding Difficult Discussions.

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Don’t be afraid to bring up topics like drinking, drugs, and sex. Make it clear to them that you are available to listen whenever they require it.

14. Overburdening Them With Activities

Don’t overburden your child with activities. School is stressful enough, and sometimes a little playtime is all they need. It also includes pressuring them to get better grades by getting extra tutoring apps, books, and a range of other things that could be burdensome to some children.

15. Comparing Your Situation to That of Other Parents

It’s challenging to be a parent, and it’s even more complicated when we compare ourselves to other parents who we believe are doing a better job than us! Take it easy on yourself and trust your instincts – you are the expert on your children!

16. Losing Your Patience

We know it’s another difficult one, but it’s one to which we’d all like to aspire!

A calm, reasonable request or command is more likely to elicit a positive response from most children. Use yelling only in emergencies to get your child’s attention.

17. Constantly Nag Them

It is a no-no when it comes to nagging. What you can do is firmly request things consistently. Also, applaud and reward them for acting promptly. If necessary, issue a warning and give an adverse outcome if the task is incomplete.

18. Not Reading With Them

Continue to read with your child. When a child learns to read on their own, bedtime stories can become less frequent, but reading together allows time for cuddles and allows you to talk about the story while taking turns reading.

19. Forgetting to Laugh and Relax

Don’t forget to laugh as a group! Being a parent can be difficult at times, so make time to laugh together now and then.

20. Being Eager to Save Them

Don’t rush to save your child from the consequences of their actions if the results aren’t severe or dangerous. It is how they learn!

21. Giving Up

Don’t give up. Do not threaten but then fail to act. Repeating a warning but not acting sends the message to the child that they can continue. If a child misbehaves, there must be repercussions.

Give your child a warning, and then, if they do it again, give them an immediate consequence, such as a time-out. If they continue, you should leave the situation.

22. Being Hard on Yourself the Children

It’s a thankless job – we all want to be the perfect parent, but we all make mistakes. Take it easy on yourself and others – we are quick to criticize our own and other parents’ abilities when we should be enjoying our time when our allies need us!

Bottom Line

As we’ve discovered, being the perfect parent is an impossible feat, but being a great parent is attainable if we put in the effort not to do things parents should never do. 

You’ll find that the children will respect you more and you’ll feel less tense. Overall, the atmosphere at home will become more harmonious. 

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